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--It ain't wise ta trifle with me, boy!
[ The sounds of heat, of things crackling and sizzling in the background. If one listens close, they can hear labored breathing as something shifts out of rubble. Very quietly, another voice speaks, this time fairly close to the NV: ]
Way things are going, this guy's gonna make a souffle out of me if I don't start doing more than trifling with him. Sheesh.
[ There's a beat of silence, followed by movement and the rush of air, following by several thwipping sounds. ]
Well, hoss -- can I call ya hoss? -- I think if ya let me get a word in edgewise, I'm pretty darn sure we can come to an agreement. [ And this is all said with a very well-done Texan accent. ] Yanno, like right propah Christian fol -- ohman!
[ Another blast of heat-noise, followed by the telltale hiss of burning metal. ]
Didn't anyone ever tell you about Smokey the bear? [ More thwipping noises, followed by metal groaning in the background. ] Wait, what am I saying? Does Canada even have Smokey the Bear? [ Thwip, thwip. ] Would he be, like, Pete the Penguin? Bucky the Buffalo? [ A beat of silence. ] Hey, Hoss! What'd they call Smokey the Bear down in Texas?
Don't know what you're talkin' about and I don't rightfully care, Spider-man. [ Distantly, you can hear sirens wailing and the crackle of fire. ] Only names you oughta be worryin' about is which one they're gonna put on your gravestone.
Ya think Eastwood's taken, or is that a bit too presumptuous?
--Burn, Spider! [ A blast of heat the sends static crackling through the NV ] Ya should've known not t'cross a businessman in love with his job.
Oh, is that what you do? [ He laughs. ] Thought for sure I was cracking down on a rodeo clown.
Alright already! I'm from Texas; I get it! [ Spider-man laughs, and there's more sizzling air. ] Can't ya stand still and fight me like a ma--oomph!
[ The sound of flesh cracking against flesh, certainly not hard enough to kill, but still. Pretty dang hard. ]
Sorry, partner! Can't do that. The whole Spider-thing is kind of my schtick. [ A moment of silence that suddenly explodes with noise. ] --Woah! I'd ask if you knew how to hit the broad side of a barn, but -- you know what, never mind. I'll ask anyway: dude, can you even hit the broad side of a barn?
--Wasn't aimin' at you, partner.
[ A beat. ]
Ohcrapohcrapohcrap.
[ Thwip, thwip, thwip, thwip, thwip, followed by the groaning of metal again, so much louder than the first time. ]
Looks like you jus' cashed a check your damn smart mouth couldn't handle, boy.
That's... what... she... said...?
Lord Almighty, don't ya ever stop yammerin'?!
[ There's another ear-splitting explosion, and the feed cuts off entirely this time, eventually droning off into static. ]
[ ooc | Details here! This post is a go for action tag spam for those who want to meet Spider-man while he's helping to put out the fire, and Spider-man will be answering his NV later on in the morning, after the fires have been put out. And if the orange bothers anyone, just let me know and I'll change it to another color! ]
[ The sounds of heat, of things crackling and sizzling in the background. If one listens close, they can hear labored breathing as something shifts out of rubble. Very quietly, another voice speaks, this time fairly close to the NV: ]
Way things are going, this guy's gonna make a souffle out of me if I don't start doing more than trifling with him. Sheesh.
[ There's a beat of silence, followed by movement and the rush of air, following by several thwipping sounds. ]
Well, hoss -- can I call ya hoss? -- I think if ya let me get a word in edgewise, I'm pretty darn sure we can come to an agreement. [ And this is all said with a very well-done Texan accent. ] Yanno, like right propah Christian fol -- ohman!
[ Another blast of heat-noise, followed by the telltale hiss of burning metal. ]
Didn't anyone ever tell you about Smokey the bear? [ More thwipping noises, followed by metal groaning in the background. ] Wait, what am I saying? Does Canada even have Smokey the Bear? [ Thwip, thwip. ] Would he be, like, Pete the Penguin? Bucky the Buffalo? [ A beat of silence. ] Hey, Hoss! What'd they call Smokey the Bear down in Texas?
Don't know what you're talkin' about and I don't rightfully care, Spider-man. [ Distantly, you can hear sirens wailing and the crackle of fire. ] Only names you oughta be worryin' about is which one they're gonna put on your gravestone.
Ya think Eastwood's taken, or is that a bit too presumptuous?
--Burn, Spider! [ A blast of heat the sends static crackling through the NV ] Ya should've known not t'cross a businessman in love with his job.
Oh, is that what you do? [ He laughs. ] Thought for sure I was cracking down on a rodeo clown.
Alright already! I'm from Texas; I get it! [ Spider-man laughs, and there's more sizzling air. ] Can't ya stand still and fight me like a ma--oomph!
[ The sound of flesh cracking against flesh, certainly not hard enough to kill, but still. Pretty dang hard. ]
Sorry, partner! Can't do that. The whole Spider-thing is kind of my schtick. [ A moment of silence that suddenly explodes with noise. ] --Woah! I'd ask if you knew how to hit the broad side of a barn, but -- you know what, never mind. I'll ask anyway: dude, can you even hit the broad side of a barn?
--Wasn't aimin' at you, partner.
[ A beat. ]
Ohcrapohcrapohcrap.
[ Thwip, thwip, thwip, thwip, thwip, followed by the groaning of metal again, so much louder than the first time. ]
Looks like you jus' cashed a check your damn smart mouth couldn't handle, boy.
That's... what... she... said...?
Lord Almighty, don't ya ever stop yammerin'?!
[ There's another ear-splitting explosion, and the feed cuts off entirely this time, eventually droning off into static. ]
[ ooc | Details here! This post is a go for action tag spam for those who want to meet Spider-man while he's helping to put out the fire, and Spider-man will be answering his NV later on in the morning, after the fires have been put out. And if the orange bothers anyone, just let me know and I'll change it to another color! ]