sirenspull | one (VIDEO.)

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one (VIDEO.)

[ well golly who could this green woman be. she's walking and dressed in wow -- not a unitard though her hair is as huge as ever and she doesn't exactly look that happy. it's earlyish morning when she turns on the video ]

Wow, here again? Does my priorities mean nothing anymore? [ the corner of her mouth pulls and she sighs ] Right-o. So I'm She-Hulk. Shulkie. Jennifer Walters, former lawyer, bounty hunter, Avenger, Fantastic Four member, Defenders, SHIELD, Fantastic Force, Hero for Hire, Lady Liberator, aaaaaaand Fearsome Four. [ she's counting this all off on her fingers btw ]

It's a pleasure to meet whoever's still here. I already know how this all goes so no need to give me the rundown.

[ a beat as she just kind of rubs the back of her neck. ]

So, what's up?

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[ extreme eyerolling ]

So did anything happen that I should know about?

[STOP IGNORING HIS INQUIRIES SHULKIE, JEEZ]

It's been two years since I saw you last. Not one.

[ SHE ASKS THE QUESTIONS OK ]

You can leave the sarcasm at the door, sweetie.

What-- It's true. I went home for a year. A week here.

Wait, when!? What happened?

[ a pause ]

Oh my gosh, is that why you're naked?

[Sherlock subconsciously clutches his sheet tighter around him.]

No. Why would-- [SIGH] It was in January.

Oh.

[ a beat ]

So did you miss me?

You still keep skirting the adoption question.

[ GGGGHHHHHHH ]

Why do you caaaare?

I don't care. I noticed.

She's my niece, okay?

And you're taking care of her due to extenuating circumstances. It suits you.

What's that supposed to mean?

Like, I said, the glow of motherhood. Fuller cheeks, slight crow's feet around the eyes. To start with, anyway.

[OLDER AND HEAVIER at least he's being somewhat delicate]