[Video] The Mad Scientist is in?

[scienceshow]

[Hello, SP. Your resident mad genius has decided to grace you all with his presence.]

The sheer number of you complaining about this illness has gotten on my nerves. Therefore, out of the goodness of my heart -- and for the sake of hearing something different on the NV network -- I am volunteering my services and my intelligence to find a way to end this epidemic.

[Yeah, complete asshole alert! ...and then he turns serious. Because this is serious.]

That being said, I will require an individual to volunteer themselves for experimentation. I am only extending this request to Newcomers. I cannot guarantee this will be a successful process, nor can I guarantee it will be without pain. I cannot even guarantee your life. What I can guarantee is that I will not rest until I find the solution for this disease, no matter how many times I have to kill you to do it.

That being said: yes, this is a serious request. No, I don't expect just anyone to volunteer for it. I suggest you seriously consider it before even replying to this message.

Comments

[video]

[scienceshow]

[He realizes, but he's answering anyway.]

Of course I am. Completely and unforgivably insane, and absolutely lacking in morality.

What's your point?

[video]

[paterelohim]

Pretty much-

[excuse him, he's throwing up. On camera. Not muting it, because screw you, you freak.]

-uh, pretty much to get someone else to answer me publicly. Psychopaths should really come with warning labels.

[video]

[scienceshow]

[...ew. Not that Szayel so much as blinks; he's used to this sort of thing.]

Unfortunately, wearing a shirt that says, 'I am the embodiment of madness,' is my style.

[video]

[paterelohim]

That's what I'm here for.

[video] That was supposed to be an "isn't". FINGERS!!! DX

[scienceshow]

A rather wasted effort. I would assume most humans would have the common sense to realize I was out of my mind asking them to volunteer themselves to be turned into a flesh box of potentially lethal chemicals in an effort to find a cure.

...perhaps I'm giving humanity too much credit, however. Carry on.

[video] et tu, fingers? D:

[paterelohim]

Then why ask at all if you admit you're completely psycho?

[video]

[scienceshow]

Because if this illness has become as bad as people are reporting, then individuals can become desperate.

And I am a genius. If one were to risk their life to find a cure, I would be the person to go to.

[video]

[paterelohim]

Well, they know at least now that you're transparently exploiting them for a chance to get some kicks.

So this is just masturbation.

[video]

[scienceshow]

Oh please, if I wanted to masturbate, I would lock my door and do so.

[Pause for mental image to sink in.]

[...]

[...]

[...]

[...okay, good.]

This is merely for the sake of finding something different to read or watch on the network, and not yet another post of poor Timmy throwing up his lunch again.

[video] guess who finally figured out how to shut up around psychopaths

[paterelohim]

I guess trolling's a valid motive on its own.

[No it's not, you fucking lunatic. :) ]

Anyway, this has been riveting? But I think I need to throw up more, so-

[He (very convincingly) fakes being about to vomit, and hangs up abruptly.

Bai.]