sirenspull | 005 {Text}

[It's been a tough week for John, for a multitude of reasons, but for our purposes we're focusing on the fact that his friend and roommate up and disappeared. John's taking it as a sort of sign to finally move out of the starter apartments, and as soon as he sent his and Bobby's things to storage, he set out for a new apartment.

He's surprised he was able to find one so quick. The rent's fairly affordable, due to the proximity to sector 9, but he can't go all in by himself. Plus, he doesn't know ayone in town who needs a place to live.

Shit. Time to make friends.]

WANTED -Looking for a roommate to split an apartment in northwest sector 4, a few blocks up from Baxter transit stop. Monthly rent even split, utilities not included and negotiable. Basic furnishing, no tv. -Must be human, 28 or older, no gender preference. Company affiliated need not apply. No cats. Must be comfortable around a variety of weapons and disruptions at late hours. Must be able to mind your own buisness. -Contact me if interested.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

But then you have to wonder about the dry-cleaning bill, because honestly, they make a mess. Keeping fallen angels around is almost like having another pet, just in a different species. They climb on the furniture, they eat all of your food, they aren't very grateful, but I will be damned if they aren't always happy to see you at the end of the day. It's like having some kind of parrot, you know, they even come when they're called, and by Hades, can they speak! I should monopolize on this. I could clone them and sell them for millions of dollars. Want a piece of Heaven itself? Everyone can own it for a cheap reasonable price! It's like real estate, but with attractive people instead of the awkward woman with the bad teeth informing you of your mortgage rates, and how useful they can be! They make for excellent wall art and they double as feather dusters. Humans certainly aren't so useful.

Oh, sorry. I've just received your text.

No, I'm not, but I suppose I might be momentarily. Perhaps.

Would you like to rent him for an hour?

you think you're hot shit don't you?

No, actually. That's the magic of it.

I don't have to spread rumors or act anything different than what I actually am for people to listen to me. I am nothing more than the demon down the street (or down the city as you can't possibly afford to live in my neighborhood), but here you are, still speaking to me, because you are either bored, lonely, or both. Regardless, you are still listening to me, because I have captivated one of the six brain cells you still have.

That is why I won. And the rest of you pathetic insects lost.

You still haven't answered my question, by the way.

I take cash or credit.

In my personal opinion, he's worth a new mortgage.

[Holy shit Crowley, shut up.

John's not going to answer, and it has nothing to do with the fact that Crowley got him to laugh.]

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