[video]

[shifting]

All right. We're havin' an event at Merlotte's. It's been too damn long and I've missed the big ones, so I'm decidin' right now that one's happening. ....Wednesday. There, it's decided. M'callin' it "Take Back The Night". There'll be live music and drink specials and all sorts of good times. Just for fun, it'll be a semi-formal theme.

We're also still hirin' for a number of positions, and I'm in need of an assistant manager in a pretty bad way. Come on in for an interview any day this week between 2 an' 4.

[reaching over to shut off the monitor. Stops. Squints.]

...And I'd just like to say to certain unnamed parties that I taste just fine, so fuck you.

[click]

Comments

[voice]

[shifting]

No! He said he wouldn't 'cause I smelled or some shit. Made some comment about me bein' a turducken.

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

A...what?

[voice]

[shifting]

A turducken. It's when you cook a chicken inside a duck inside a turkey.

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

And how does that make any -

[Oh. Right.]

...Never mind. Well. Answer me, then: why is that a bad thing?

[voice]

[shifting]

It's like bein' told you don't bathe regularly.

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

But you do bathe regularly. What would it matter if some oversexed, condescending idiot whose only claim to fame is making even worse this city's already-hideous nightlife said otherwise? Frankly, he probably would not know a good smell if presented with one clearly labeled and categorized, as he's no doubt spent a long time now with cheap bad cologne in his nostrils.

[voice]

[manofthenorth]

That is a slur on my character, Mr. Edgeworth, and quite unprovoked, I might add.

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

Then take me to court for slander. What are you doing smelling Mr. Merlotte?

[voice]

[manofthenorth]

I have an incredibly acute sense of smell, so I have little choice in the matter. You might ask him about his sense of smell at some point, I'm told the two are much the same.

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

Tell me, Mr. Northman: why do you think this is the right time for provocations?

[voice]

[manofthenorth]

It is you, Mr. Edgeworth, who is attempting to provoke me. I am merely conveying the facts, as I know them. In absolute innocence.

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

I assure you that I'm trying to do nothing of the sort. I'm addressing your recklessness. Could there not perhaps be a more opportune time for attempting to goad people into doing what amuses you?

[voice]

[manofthenorth]

I beg your pardon?

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

There are blood-mad vampires on the loose. This was the best time to start a debate with Mr. Merlotte over the quality of his blood?

[voice]

[manofthenorth]

It was a private conversation. He was the one that took offense - at a perfectly innocent comment, I might add - and escalated it the way that it has been.

You can't really think this is my fault, and blaming it on me is only an exercise in your prejudice, Mr. Edgeworth.

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

Prejudice.

[voice]

[manofthenorth]

What would you call it?

[voice]

[shifting]

[glancing at the conversation...]

What are you arguin' with him over?

[voice]

[ergomaniac]

I called him a provocateur; he called me prejudiced.

[voice]

[shifting]

So ya'll are makin' friends then.