Text --> Video.

[crowsicle]

ok so it looks like you learn something new every day
as in you learn every day has some new bullshit its dedicated to like national tree history month or worldwide nigerian spam appreciation day
todays a pretty special one though
thanks agi by the way this has been real educational
im so inspired by your teachings ive decided to put together my own instructive video
gather round girls and boys
today were going to learn you how to choke a chicken
starring me
and my red feathery mutant cock
you ready for this sirens port


ok so it looks like you learn something new every day
as in you learn every day has some new bullshit its dedicated to like national tree history month or worldwide nigerian spam appreciation day
todays a pretty special one though
thanks agi by the way this has been real educational
im so inspired by your teachings ive decided to put together my own instructive video
gather round girls and boys
today were going to learn you how to choke a chicken
starring me
and my red feathery mutant cock
you ready for this sirens port

[The feed switches to video of a bedroom wall, and then quickly pans down to Davesprite's lap--where he's holding a live, half-grown, red-feathered rooster--which some people might recognize as one of the dyed Easter chicks he found--who quickly jumps ship in a squawking flurry of feathers. The feed ends.]

Comments

Re: text

[crowsicle]

look we already got me you dick and duke
thats my bros chicken by the way
so thats four
and im sure we could rope some other people into it
wasnt that underwear model chick who was in the races running for mayor or something
i mean thatd be a pretty powerful person to get on our side we could actually see some social change around here

[reassures]

You really do like four letter D names, don't you?

I'm not sure we make up a big enough group to get a mayor-hopeful on our side though, even with four of us.

[crowsicle]

we could let the angels into our sweet exclusive club too i guess
i think i saw some magical flying ponies too
though maybe the doors arent so much of a problem for them as you know not having thumbs
we could add that to our agenda im a generous guy

[reassures]

I don't know how much we can do for them if they don't have thumbs!

I've heard the angels here don't actually have wings, though-- are you sure they count?

[crowsicle]

i saw a video of this thing they have in japan where like
you kick a button with your foot and the door opens for you
tell me that wouldnt be literally the coolest thing ever
i bet even the angels would spring for installing something like that i mean theres no arguing with that kind of awesome technology
theyre angels theyve gotta be all over good deeds like that

[reassures]

[Dave what

dude she can't even

This is probably the most random conversation she's had in a long time but SHE IS LAUGHING SO MUCH]

That would be really cool! I think we should definitely try it.

Don't they already have buttons like that that you can hit with your hand, though?

[crowsicle]

but what if the little magical ponies cant reach the buttons thatd be so sad
ok maybe i just want the cool japanese foot buttons
though damn i just remembered i cant use them
oh well
this is a sacrifice im willing to make
never let it be said i didnt take one for the team

[reassures]

Well, we could keep the hand buttons, too! So you and the ponies can use them.

Why can't you use the foot buttons, though?

[crowsicle]

oh
i kind of dont have feet
im like half ghost or something
its basically off the wall ridiculous how many random things im made up of
and thats not even counting green slime ectobabies

[reassures]

You're-- made up of ectobabies?

[crowsicle]

what
no
uh
fuck i dont even know where to begin this shit
ok basically im a kid who jumped into a strobe light and became a bird ghost with a sword through its chest
and then i found out that my bro is a paradox clone of himself and his dna slime got mixed with my friends moms and then we came out
so my bro is actually my dad and my friend is actually my sister??
and i am actually an alternate future me
did you follow all that

[reassures]

[This reply kind of... takes a bit... Some of these concepts she's a little familiar with, but others not so much.]

You said you were a game guide-- so the strobe light was the game?

There's more than one of you, and you're related to your friend. And-- more than one of your bro, I think.

...The sword-- isn't still there, is it? I mean, someone must have helped you, right?

[crowsicle]

yeah basically all of that
the strobe light was a part of the game its really not important anymore so dont worry about that
and the sword wasnt really ever a problem
i wouldnt mind having it back honestly it looked pretty badass
but yeah its gone now
cant have it all i guess

[reassures]

What happened to the sword?

[crowsicle]

lost it
i kind of got in a fight before i got here
its ok bro and dave are letting me borrow a spare

[reassures]

[Oh. Ouch.]

You're okay though-- right? Everything is healing?

[crowsicle]

yeah definitely
just waiting on the wing fairy for my last few feathers and then im golden
its almost like it never even happened

[reassures]

Oh, thank goodness.

I hope they grow in soon.