[Accidental Video --> Text] Back-dated to 5-ish this afternoon

[crowsicle]

[The feed clicks on to an aerial view of Siren's Port, just above the rooftops. The camera lingers only briefly on any sight before panning abruptly to something else without giving the viewer time to focus. It dips suddenly and a rooftop rushes up towards the screen, but there's a great flapping noise and the view slows to a stop about five feet above the roof.

Something orange can be seen near the bottom of the screen, but then the view lifts again to scan the dull, cloudy sky. The view is blocked again suddenly by the same orange streaked with liquid yellow--a hand? The view is jostled, and someone lets out a terse, shaky breath.

Whoever it is then seems to notice that the video is recording.] What the fuck.

[The video feed ends. This text hits the network shortly afterwards:]

ok
i call party foul
not only did someone bust a keg open over their moms priceless shitstain of an oriental rug but looks like they dropped the whole universe down on our upward gaping faces
president obama himself revokes the frats party license because its such a goddamn national travesty
whose planet is this even
is it the land of fuck and you because this isnt my stop im turning this bus around
seriously
wtf
this place doesnt belong here
im basically a feathery teenage game guide at this point and i got nothing that accounts for some crapsack frozen city popping up out of nowhere
so what asshole jacked this shit into their garage sale gameshark
whoever it is press left a b start select right now or im gonna pull a hard reset on their zit encrusted face
fistways
what im asking i guess
since i had my hands full retconning the universe for anyone whos still got the internet connection to read this
is whose shit do i need to wreck for this inconsiderate fubar

ok
i call party foul
not only did someone bust a keg open over their moms priceless shitstain of an oriental rug but looks like they dropped the whole universe down on our upward gaping faces
president obama himself revokes the frats party license because its such a goddamn national travesty
whose planet is this even
is it the land of fuck and you because this isnt my stop im turning this bus around
seriously
wtf
this place doesnt belong here
im basically a feathery teenage game guide at this point and i got nothing that accounts for some crapsack frozen city popping up out of nowhere
so what asshole jacked this shit into their garage sale gameshark
whoever it is press left a b start select right now or im gonna pull a hard reset on their zit encrusted face
fistways
what im asking i guess
since i had my hands full retconning the universe for anyone whos still got the internet connection to read this
is whose shit do i need to wreck for this inconsiderate fubar

Comments

text;

[crowsicle]

lets be real who else would it be
what did you do this time man

text;

[existy]

hey, long time no talk!
and well, uh, i woke up this morning and i ate waffles.
they were pretty good, you should try them!
then i went to work like i always do as if i was a serious business guy, then i...

text;

[crowsicle]

john no shut up
theres basically no way this isnt your fault somehow but everyones been saying something about a core so im going to give you the benefit of the doubt
because im just that charitable
whats been going on in this place how many of us are here
ps your planet sucks nic cages withered teats

text;

[existy]

whoa, whoa, whoa.
not so fast! all these questions are putting me in a tizzy.
i'm not even sure i should oblige myself to answer you now that you insulted cage's personal belongings.
but seriously, i had no idea this was all my fault!
hey, maybe i should take out my wand and summon liv tyler in the flesh since i'm apparently oh so powerful enough to bring everyone here.

text;

[crowsicle]

i dont know dude
i bet you were just traipsing along like an airheaded moron when you came across a button labeled HUGE MISTAKE
and lo and behold you pressed the everloving fuck out of it like the button was drowning and needed cpr
what did you do getting jade in the game

text;

[existy]

oh, ha ha, very funny.
but even if i did push some dumb apocalyptic button, it's ok!
we're not playing any more games, at least not life threatening ones, and we're all together now.
see? this is us, talking in a very normal and safe environment like good buddies should.

[ Siren's Port may be a weird definition of "safe," but try to go along with it. ]

like i have said once, and will say it again, this is the eternal sleepover that never ends.
welcome!

text;

[crowsicle]

[...]

you can paint my nails if i can do your makeup
by the time im through with you honey you are going to be fuckin fabulous
break out all your back issues of cosmo
girl were making this makeover hapen