sirenspull | 002

Entry tags:

002 | text

[Jo Harvelle woke up in a bed that was her's, was supposed to be familiar, but with a sense of panic she hasn't felt in months.]

[Private to Dean Winchester + Mary Winchester]

please tell me you're here and cas didn't get you too. or the leviathan. or whatever the fuck he was.

[/end filter]

[Because yes, she died. Cas, possessed by his Leviathans, killed her in the street on her way to work. Just one of many.

But it's definitely a good thing there's a text function on this thing, because there's no way she would have been able to hold a video function steady. She woke up just a few minutes ago, shaking and in pain, so much pain, but not as much as before - Cas. But there were other things, memories. She remembered dying, remembered it in detail, but there was more. More that scared her, worried her, more that she didn't want to think about.

Her hands still shake, and it takes more than just a few minutes to type this up and send it out, but she has to know. It's bugging her more than it should, and she just can't let it sit in her head like it is.]

I've heard of people going home. Coming back with new memories, new history, shooting up in the timeline, whatever you want to call it.

But I've been out for weeks. And I definitely did not go home.

I'm not going crazy, am I? Has anyone else heard about that?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Dean sets up some water to boil and comes back to sit next to her on the couch. He carefully slips an arm around her, hoping to be comforting instead of awkward.]

No one can turn down mac n' cheese. If you eat a little I'll break out the beers and we can put on some Zeppelin and relax until Sammy makes it back.

[She doesn't even notice but it's an almost immediate reaction when she leans into him, putting her head on his shoulder. Jo closes her eyes but sees too much, remembers too much, and decides to open them again and laugh a little bit.]

You sure know how to treat a girl. [it's supposed to be their kind of banter, back and forth, but she can't seem to put much into the words. They just sound tired. Because now that's she's not freaking out, thinking something will break into the apartment that isn't really her's anymore, she's realizing just how exhausted her body really is.

Not that she'll be able to sleep, but still.]

Mac n' cheese doesn't sound too bad, though.

I know how to treat a friend. [Dean corrects her. He's pretty well known for not being all that great in the women department and even though deep beneath the surface he felt something for Jo he knows he could never follow through with it because he owes her too much and doesn't want to see her dead again.

Even though he knew that, it didn't help him from feeling punched in the stomach when she leaned up into his shoulder. His hand curls around the side of her arm and he shifts under her weight so they're both more relaxed.]

I'll cut up some hot dogs and put it in there. You look like you could use some protein.

[The way he says 'friend' almost makes her sit back up, because it hurts somewhere in her chest. A little ping, a sharp little pain, but she's just so tired and the energy it would take to pull away from him, to sit up on her own, would be too much. So she doesn't, just resettles against him when he shifts, glancing up at him.]

I haven't had mac n' cheese with hotdogs since I was a kid. [but then she smiles because that actually sounds great, and hey there Dean. She just got back from being a Darkness monster, she didn't have a lot of time to eat healthy.] Not that I'm complaining.

When Sam was still a kid I used to make it for him all the time.

[Dean smooths a hand over the side of her hair and slowly pulls up to go and put the noodles into the boiling water. When he comes back he settles back down and pulls her up against him again. It was nice, not having to worry about anything but taking care of her. It'd been a while since their lives were calm enough to just take it easy. He missed being twenty-six and staying at the roadhouse with them after hunts.]

Hey, just relax. I'm here and you don't have to go back to your place until you're ready.

My mom used to make it for me whenever Dad was on hunts. She'd give it to me in this little bowl and then sit me on the counter while she worked the bar at the Roadhouse. [She could go on, talk about how Ellen would let her take control of the TV if no one seemed to be watching it. How a lonely hunter every now and then would tell her stories when Ellen's back was turned.

They were good memories. Memories that made her miss home. Memories that hurt when she realized how far gone she really was from there. But for some reason, telling them here with Dean didn't hurt as much. Actually felt nice. She sat up when he got up to leave, reaching down and taking off her shoes as he put the food on, curling up against him when he came back.]

Thanks, it won't be for long. I just couldn't... just. Thanks.

This place put me in a pine box too.

[Dean looks up at the ceiling, remembering everything pretty vividly.] It's not easy. I think the fact that you come back is the hardest thing to deal with.

Edited 2013-01-04 21:38 (UTC)

[She frowns, then turns her head up to face him, her head still on his shoulder.]

What happened?

[Jo doesn't know if that's asking too much, if Dean would rather not talk about it, but she's curious. When he talks about coming back, she almost snorts.]

You'd think coming back would be nice - hey. You don't die. Congrats. But in a way it almost makes it worse.

Exactly.

[Dean rubs her shoulder.] And uh, some kinda plague wiped me out. After I came back Cas told me it nabbed the people with guilt weighin' 'em down.

Guilt?

[for some reason that makes her want to frown more. It was enough to kill him and it was caused by guilt? The mention of Cas makes her tense, and she tilts her head back down again so she's not looking up at him.]

That's...messed up.

Yeah, well, Mom gotta see me roast in my own body at the hospital. Sam too.

[Dean swallows hard.] Sam took off after that, and disappeared for a while.

When he came back he... wasn't the same. Not worse, but- [He shrugs.] Same with you. You've come and gone before too. Not that either of you remember what happened when you were here the first time.

[Jo would nod, if she still didn't have her head leaning against his shoulder. Instead she just listens, tries to imagine what it would be like. Sitting in a hospital, going like that. She doesn't think she could do it, watch him or anyone she cared about go like that. That was the one good thing about their lives, or what used to be their lives. At least it ended quick.]

I wish I could remember. [she does. She really, really does. Especially when she meets people who remember her, who knew her from before. It felt like something had been taken from her, something she would never get back.] Knew what I did, who I talked to. Maybe I wouldn't make the same mistakes. [Because something must have happened to her, if she left. Came back again.] But I don't. I can't. I've tried but I don't know. It's not there.

I know how you feel. [Dean sighs and leans his head back across the ridge of the couch.] Apparently I've been here a few times.

But you've been here for what, ten months?

[She shifts again, leaning her knee against his legs. Keeping close.]

How long has this place even been here?

Yeah, but before I was here they'd gone through a few rounds. Mom didn't hold back.

[Dean takes her hand and laces his finger through hers.]

Beats me.

How long has she been here?

[Jo watches their hands, runs the pad of her thumb over his fingers.]

This place needs a cheat sheet.

Hell yeah. Life'd be a lot easier if all the answers were in the back of the book.

[she laughs.]

Life hasn't been that easy since fourth grade math.

You're tellin' me.

Even then the teachers could always tell.

[She moves her head again, sets her chin on his shoulder to look at him, but keeps their fingers interlocked.]

Did you go to public school? Ever? I always thought your dad home-schooled you and Sam with how much y'all traveled.

Yeah, once in a while me and Sammy both went the normal route. Usually when Dad was away for longer than a month. I made sure he got two and from school and had a little free time to enjoy myself.

[He gives Jo a squeeze.] Didn't help that Sam begged either.

Begged? To go to school? [her nose scrunches up at the thought.] I hated public school. Full of idiots who had no idea what was really going on.

[because she did, cooped up in her mom's bar listening to old, drunk men tell stories. But that was besides the point.]

You didn't miss much, believe me.

I know, but I'm glad he got an education. Tried to keep him as young as I could for as long as I could.

He ended up going to college too, right?

[Jo found herself smiling up at Dean.]

You're a good older brother.

Yeah, scored himself a free ride to Stanford. Then the apocalypse went and messed everything up.

002 | text

action;

action;

action;

action;

Re: action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;