001: Video

[hulkbusted]

[The man on the screen looks utterly exhausted. Haggard might even be apt considering the greyish pallor of his skin under his dark stubble and the even darker circles under his eyes. When the video jostles in his hold for a moment, it displays his bare chest before coming up to his face. He looks like he tried to wash off some combination of mud, sand, and various other things best not examined too closely and didn't do too great a job of it. Despite that, he tries for a tired smile and a finger taps the screen before withdrawing.]

First off, I'd like to say that Tony Stark makes the world's most durable phone. I'd do a testimonial commercial, but that might be in bad taste.

Second, I've read some of the information available and I think you'll understand it's not the easiest thing to swallow, but I'm going with it as a working theory for now. Don't ask why, it's a long story.

Third... [He trails off and turns his head away from the camera before looking back at it] I don't know what the third is, let's say I want to issue a blanket apology and leave it at that.

[ooc: The Hulk ended up getting stuck outside at sundown and fought (pounding and getting pounded on) all night. Between that and a chitauri invasion, I figure Bruce is feeling a little run down.]

Comments

[symmachy]

[She decides not to say that the past nine thousand, nine hundred and ninety years of her life have been spent building up a background of horrors. That would have to wait for their second date I mean meeting.

She gives a halfassed golf clap.]

Excellent. Then I believe it's time I showed you some cheap living quarters, unless you'd prefer to explore on your own.

[hulkbusted]

[He gives her either a tiny ironic bow or really deep inclination of his head and goes to dump the wrecked pants in the garbage after tucking his NV in his pocket.]

You don't have to do that. I've found someplace to stay for now. [He almost laughs.] I've had several offers from people who know Bruce Banner.

[symmachy]

[She smiles, and ambles out the door with him.

And then cocks an eyebrow.]

Is that not your name?

[Boy you better not have lied to her.]

[hulkbusted]

It's my name. [He's more amused than abashed.] And they know the Hulk, but it's not me. You know Deadpool, right? He says he knows you. He knows a Bruce Banner who gets big and green; it's just not me.

[symmachy]

[She nods idly. Yes, she knew Deadpool. And yes, this was beginning to make sense.]

Different dimensions are a pain, aren't they?

[hulkbusted]

If it didn't seem like every other person here already knows what's up with me, I wouldn't have told you about it, so yeah, it's a pain.

[But what are you going to do? And besides, she's interesting company who might not have been quite as interesting if he'd kept things under wraps.]

I think I can find Kevin's place. [He could do something crazy and ask to see her again, but habit counsels against it.]

[symmachy]

I know what you mean. There are at least six other vampires here, all of them bloodsuckers. I felt like I had to set the record straight almost as soon as I arrived.

[Because bloodsuckers gave her a bad reputation, and if she was going to make friends and all that shit, she couldn't have them be scared of her teeth. She nods, and offers him her small hand for a shake. There may or may not be a slip of paper with her phone number on it.]

Good luck, Bruce. I'll see you later.

[And when she walks away, you can only look at her ass for like five seconds before she'll notice.]

[hulkbusted]

[Five, four, three, she looks like she's a teenager, two, really Bruce, one... zero and then he's looking at the number in his hand and maybe, probably, definitely memorizing it.]