Text.

[where_the_hearth_is]

I am over one hundred years old, imperial absolute. I have missed people before, been made briefly sad by my Mistresses's absences. But I have never mourned before.

I am stuck in feedback loops. Statistically, she will probably return in a tiny fraction of the time that typically passed between my Mistress's visits. But she may not. I cannot seem to resolve any of my routines considering the matter, and given how many of them are occupied with precisely that - I find my functions somewhat strained.

Is this how grief feels for everyone? How do you handle it?

Comments

text/private/99% unhackable;

[thefourteenth]

Find tasks to occupy your time and energy. For you, it may take a great deal more than a living thing.

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[where_the_hearth_is]

A great deal more, I am afraid. Many of my most expansive normal pastimes are lost to me here; I have struggled against boredom since I arrived.

And now it is considerably more painful than boredom.

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[thefourteenth]

I can give you a task.

[Then a knock at the door.]

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[magnetic_magpie]

Oh House. Yes, that is how grief feels. Would you like company?

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[where_the_hearth_is]

I think I would like it, yes.

But you needn't, unless it would comfort you as well. I know you cared for Mary too, and for others lost recently. I didn't understand, before. How much it meant.

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[magnetic_magpie]

It would yes. I need so time to myself. To not have to take care of someone else.

[littlepinksuitcase]

[Meryl sits and looks at the message a long time before replying. She hadn't really expected to feel how she feels now when she began perusing the network.]

When I think I've someone I've lost, I think of all the things I wish I could say to them—all the things I already said that I wish I could say again, only better. And it hurts that I can't. That's how grief feels for me.

I don't know how we handle it. We just do.

[where_the_hearth_is]

Yes. It is much like that.

I am unused to ignorance regarding any of my processes. I am fully aware of myself in a way organic creatures simply cannot be. I find the uncertainty disturbing.

[littlepinksuitcase]

I...excuse me? Organic?

[video]

[shifting]

It different for everyone. So's how you handle it.

[video]

[where_the_hearth_is]

Ah. I see.

How do you?

[video]

[shifting]

...That's a little personal.

[Voice]

[gavesugar]

I force myself to live. Those I mourn for would not wish me to worry about them.

[Voice]

[where_the_hearth_is]

I am not sure what my friend would have wanted.

I think I will worry anyway. But I will try not curb myself from wallowing.

[Video]

[gavesugar]

'Tis difficult not to do so. We who art left behind oft feel the pain that those who pass no longer can.

Video

[tea_lover64]

Yes, grief often feels that way. Thinking back at the time spent together, and that which is lost. People all have different reactions to it. The best way I have found is to remember them, and seek happiness.

[That is what he has been doing]

Video

[where_the_hearth_is]

[thoughtfully]

This is good advice.

I am not sure how to commemorate her best. But as long as I am whole, I will remember.

Video

[tea_lover64]

Oh no problem, House.

I think that is the best anyone can truly do.

text;

[meddler]

You go on, even when you're not sure if you can.

text;

[where_the_hearth_is]

I will go on, of course. Maintenance is very baseline, for me. And I imagine Nara would be quite disappointed if I let my quirks of affection interfere with my performance.

[Nara would actually be quite surprised, and then rather understanding; but she is House's mental shibboleth for its own high standards for itself.]

[voice]

[madeinoblivion]

I guess even Houses have got darkness and hearts.

[voice]

[where_the_hearth_is]

I assume you mean this metaphorically.

But.

Yes.

[voice]

[madeinoblivion]

How come everybody always thinks I mean it metaphorically?

[Video]

[thelightbringer]

I handle it how you'd expect. You shouldn't follow my example, the villagers would revolt.

[Video]

[where_the_hearth_is]

How should I expect?

[Still thinks you're nice, over here.]