Wednesday, July 4th 2012WeatherMostly Sunny and Clear. High 25°C and a low of 14°C (77deg;F/57°F)
Current Moon Phase: Full Moon
Morning sirens go off at 5:19am, and evening sirens are at 9:15pm.
News & AdvertisementsResident Michelangelo?Just after morning sirens, a few early morning joggers noticed a new addition to the public park! A brilliantly detailed, intricately-carved marble
statue has appeared in the park seemingly overnight, baffling art experts and public officials alike, who note both the Michaelangelo-level art technique and the estimated weight, which at over 240 kg is far too heavy for anyone unaided by super-powered strength to move.
The statue depicts an elegant woman in delicately-carved robes holding a sword to the heavens. The attached plaque reads simply: "
For bravery unmatched, And a heart larger than most." One officer identified the face as resembling Newcomer Mary Winchester, recalled from an unfortunate brush with the law during Tom Hanniger's annual Valentine's Day rampage this year.
Authorities are unsure what to do with the statue as of now, but whether or not anyone claims ownership to it, they will be forced to remove it, to protect the delicate artwork from the elements. All attempts to contact Miss Winchester have failed. So far, nobody has stepped forward with any more information on the statue.
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Food Trucks Cowtipped by Mysterious Mutation!Police believe a darkness creature or after-dark prankster is exclusively targeting food trucks to sabotage after siren . Over fourteen owners of mobile kitchens and ice cream trucks woke this morning to find that their vehicles were found tipped over sideways during the night. While curbside parking is not recommended throughout the city, well-proofed cars and vehicles usually go untouched by darkness creatures.
Motion-activated camera evidence brought forward by Tastee Treat Ice Cream Company, though grainy and low quality, reveals a medium-sized amorphous creature tipping trucks in their lot, leaving a sticky residue left behind.
This coincides with a first-hand witness account of the one-man genius behind Stu’s Stews, a resourceful entrepreneur who went from humble homeless volunteer at a Sector 9 soup kitchen to Celebrity Mobile Chef last year. He reported that his truck was tipped and broken into last night, while he was sleeping inside it. Stu crawled out of his window and fled for the safety of Skye Medical’s 24 hour clinic, where he was treated for minor injuries.
"It was like...this massive blob of a THING.” Stu told press this morning, having gotten only a quick glimpse of the creature. “It almost looked like it was SMELLING the truck before it tried to tear it open. I could have sworn I heard it whine."
The Siren’s Port Street Foods Union is interested in learning more about this prowler, and is offering free lunch vouchers redeemable for $25 to anyone coming forward with information about the creature. For union members, they will be offering reduced cost parking at their proofed Sector 8 garage, promising solid security.
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