17 [Text]

[integrity]

Someone within this city is going to buy me a drink. Immediately. I prefer scotch, but really, anything will do. I also require a sledgehammer. Crowbars are also acceptable.

Your generosity will be repaid tenfold in both money, good will, and the feathers that I will be tearing out of my favorite down pillow. If you so choose to remain so, anonymous donations can be dropped off at my mailbox at the post office.

Remember: generosity is a virtue, not a sin.

x Crowley.

Comments

[integrity]

No. Castiel thought he would be funny today and accidentally broke his vessel's spine due to the effort.

Or, well. It will be broken once I get my hands on him.

I'll tell you when I get there.

[unluckyinlove]

castiel?? FUNNY???

details

see you soon

[integrity]

[Give him about five minutes and Crowley appears inside the room where she is, looking distinctly ruffled and annoyed. He's dusting something off of his coat, but he looks a lot better than he did when he was stuck in the trap.

The things used to not bother him, but now they're just confining.]

He put Devil's Traps on my rugs in order to be cute.

[unluckyinlove]

[Jinx is sitting in the waiting room of a bank, applying lipstick. It's not very busy, but there's still a lot of uncomfortable stares when a demon suddenly exists in the room. She's wearing a very pricey business suit and there is indeed a large run in her nylons.

The sorceress looks up from her compact and can't help but grin.]

D'aww. Our tiniest angel is growing up and playing practical jokes on the Dark Side. Which means he's obviously in cahoots.

[integrity]

[ -- well, at least she wasn't lying about that. And Crowley snaps his fingers to fix her nylons in the blink of an eye -- and a roll of his own.]

He is. I've obtained confessions from one guilty party. I've yet to convict the other, but I will.

[unluckyinlove]

[Her compact snaps closed. Stretching out her leg, she looks at the perfect nylons in approval.]

Who's the suspect and who's convicted?

[integrity]

The other Crowley is still playing stupid.

[Irritably, as he slides his hands into his pockets.]

Gabriel, on the other hand, can't lie to save his life, and elected to not bother in favor of laughing at me.

[unluckyinlove]

[She purses her freshly made up lips, trying not to burst out laughing. Trying. So hard. Failing just a little.]

Okay, let me get this straight. You got played by the guy that was convinced I was princess Leia, the beta male with the leash so tight he should be thankful he doesn't need to breathe, and less handsomely dressed you.

[integrity]

[ s i g h ]

To be fair, I did send Castiel a stripper that looked like Dean Winchester, so I suppose I was asking for it.

[unluckyinlove]

[She can't. She bursts into a fit of cackles right in the bank. What is air.]

[integrity]

[ -- ugh, fine. That gets a lazy smile out of him, and a roll of his eyes, as he glances around the bank.]

I thought it was funny too, but someone, apparently, lacked a sense of humor about it.

[unluckyinlove]

Or you got out-pranked and are being a total sore loser about it.

[She tries to calm her laughter and wipes the corner of her eye with her thumb. Damn it, her eyeliner is smearing.]

[integrity]

Hardly.

[He tosses her a look.]

I'll get them back easily enough. Tony and Castiel are easy. It's Gabriel that will be difficult.

[unluckyinlove]

We're calling him Tony now?

[She reopens her compact to check her makeup, then digs through her purse for something. When she finally pulls out a comb, she offers both it and the mirror to Crowley.]

Anyway, Gabriel's the most fun to get revenge on.

[integrity]

I'm certainly not calling him Crowley.

[That's his name, dammit. He doesn't care if the other one pronounces it differently.

He arches his eyebrows at the mirror and comb, but does not take them. Instead, he continues to speak.]

Is he?

[unluckyinlove]

[With a roll of her eyes, she snaps the compact closed again and stuffs it in her purse. Then she stands up so she can comb Crowley's hair back into order.]

We're tricksters, Crowley. When you can pull one over on us, it's the most satisfying thing in the world. You don't even know how easy it is to get him, do you?

[integrity]

[ -- are you even serious what the fuck --

Okay, carefully pushing your arm back down because he can do that himself, thank you. 8|]

If I knew, I would have done it a long time ago when I was young and stupid -- and when he was trapping the Winchesters into little time loops, making Lilith's life difficult.

[unluckyinlove]

[Fine. If you're not going to let her do it, then she's going to grab your hand and forcibly put the comb in it so you can do it yourself. NOW DO IT YOURSELF. You're in public and you're a king.]

Off the top of my head....making everything he touches "sugar-free." Convincing him that bell-bottoms are back in style. Putting purple hair dye in his shampoo. "Kick me" signs. He also hates pancakes.

[integrity]

[Crowley rolls his eyes before he smooths down his jacket with his free hand.]

I had a better idea, actually -- but it requires your permission.

[unluckyinlove]

[That earns him a well deserved look.]

What's your pitch?

[integrity]

I want to remove his angel mojo via the use of sigils by placing them throughout Purgatory so his powers don't work.

[Pause.]

I did it to Castiel all the time just in case he decided to smite me.