Video...in which there is an abundance of scones

[inthejunk]

[Dawn is barely even trying to tickle the sky awake, but that doesn't seem to be squashing the enthusiasm of that annoying kid who either delivers or abuses pastries for a living -it's difficult to tell at times. There he is, with the usual shit eating customer service grin, hair rustling in the chilly breeze and full of fat, half-melted snowflakes. They don't seem to be bothering him at all.]

Attention, everyone. I'm Hanamura Yosuke. Hello to anyone who is new. There's good news this morning! Due to the weather, the scones from yesterday couldn't be sold at the Funtom bakery. I've had to come up with ways to use them, so I thought I would share.

[It's probably not a good idea to leave a somewhat resentful teenager to his own devices in a place of business. Or so one would believe, given what follows.]

If you grind them up like cat litter, they unstick snow-stuck cars. They can also be used as paper weights, and nut crackers. Some of the children on the playground have used them for stick ball! Really, the uses are endless. So please take them away before someone tries to eat one and breaks a tooth again.

[That slightly sarcastic and generally mean spirited bit of "advertisement" aside, the kid suddenly grows serious.]

Ah...there is one more use for them that I came up with. Since I didn't have anyone to ask for a blessing, I think the direct route will have to do.

[And there, behind him in the snow as he turns and pans the camera out, is one last (and equally unfirtunate) demonstration. There's something written out, huge and painstakingly, all in blueberry scone. There's even a heart made of sprinkled dried cranberry around it, which has bloomed up like rose petals with the moisture of the snow:]

MARRY ME NILL

Comments

oops typo

[inthejunk]

Yeah...there's-of course there is. She's kind of ruffled, but she's not really mad. Trust me, this will be fine.

But uh...um. I think we need to talk.

Re: oops typo

[makeflowersgrow]

She will be fine, Monsieur. You'll be happy together. And perhaps, when you are old and grey, you will come to visit me with your little ones and say, 'Look 'Ponine. Is she not beautiful?' And we will talk about your wedding day, of how drunk you were.

[Her smile fades]

Us? About what? We can talk on the sand if you like?

Re: oops typo

[inthejunk]

...Sure. You're right. This is enough spectacle already.

-And don't let me get drunk at my wedding, okay?

do you want me to stick up an awkward sand log?

[makeflowersgrow]

[She laughs again] I will perhaps allow it - but I will sober you up before your wedding night, too. I will be there in twenty minutes in a taxi, Monsieur.

sure lets do it

[inthejunk]

See you then.