sirenspull | 29 [Video] | Forward dated to the 7th.

[Crowley is alive.

This is a shocking fact, seeing as he fully expected to die. He even set up his so-called last will and testament, to set aside his funds and business transactions and all other sorts of things, in preparation for his death. However meaningless this universe is, Crowley is nothing but pragmatic. And as he sits in his chair, in his office, nothing seems out of the ordinary, save for a few things.

Once, he is holding a glass of liquor, which is hardly unusual. What is unusual is that his fingers grip it unusually tightly, almost as if he is convinced he is going to drop it. His eyes are lacking some of the spark that they usually hold, resigned and weary and ready to quit, though Crowley does not quit. He holds himself as someone who has lost a great deal but is far too stubborn to actually roll over and take it -- and as Crowley takes a sip of scotch, he clears his throat and speaks, his words slurring only slightly. He has great practice in speaking while intoxicated.]

I saw God yesterday, while I was stabbing my friend to death.

[Crowley considers that for a moment before he decides 'screw it' and finishes off his glass.]

I suppose I should get an attorney for that incriminating statement, but I'm having difficulty caring, as God is the one who put him out of his misery. The same one who allowed our world to dissolve into chaos and misery and let's not forget what He allowed His own poor stupid useless children to do to it, they killed one another because Daddy never hugged them. And you know what the best part was?

[Crowley huffs a soft laugh as he puts the glass back down. His fingers twitch to themselves and, perhaps in a delayed reaction, the demon swipes his hand across the table to let the glass hit the ground and shatter. It was only crystal. He can just buy another.]

He was right in front of our faces the entire time, God, the witless wonder that thought it would be funny to create an entire dimension dedicated to souls shredding each other for punishment and thought it would be hilarious to let Lucifer break out of his Cage and thought it would be hysterical for Castiel to --

[But Crowley stops himself, because that is getting into something of a deep and personal moment for him, and one can't have that. Instead, his tone lowers to something soft as he pushes himself up, hands keeping himself steady at his desk.]

If you want to speak with the useless twat, our Savior, His name is Chuck Shurley. Pray to Him if you want to know why Castiel lost his mind and the Leviathan ate your friends. I'm certain He has all the answers in the world for why they existed in the first place.

[And Crowley shuts off his feed by knocking his NV off of his desk.]

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[A day and a half later, he finally answers this. Good for him.]

It means a lot of things. Mostly the thing Crowley said.

But... but how?

[A day and a half has not given Blaine enough time to know how to process this.]

I don't know. I lied? A lot?

I guess... I just can't wrap my head around this.

How can you be God? I mean, I know you. In person. People aren't supposed to have lived with God as their roommate.

Well, I mean, people aren't supposed to be related to God either, but- well, there you go.

-Okay, you know what, never mind. [That was an unbelievably stupid reply and he feels stupid for saying it.] It's like this.

I went undercover- I mean, thousands of years ago. I'm me and I'm- that. I really was born, I have real parents, I went through puberty. But I'm- this, too.

Why did you do that though? Why go undercover?

[That's too big. It's too much to answer, today, on this day, with so much grief weighing so fresh over him. He puts his head between his knees for a minute, long enough that Blaine might think he hung up. Then an answer comes almost faintly.]

It- you know the story of Lucifer? Falling?

Go- go ask an angel about it. Ask them. Then you can come and- and ask me that again.

I know who Lucifer is.

I have enough people back home telling me that he's whispering in my ear and that's why I love someone like Kurt. [And Blaine says it without a lot of bitterness or anger. He doesn't think those people are Chuck's responsibility, even though that's what is at the core of him feeling hurt over this realization.]

So, you couldn't handle that your son had done something like that? I-- I think I can understand on some level.

My Lucifer- it's something else.

I. I'll have to tell you the story some day. I'll tell you the whole thing, and you'll get why I left.

But I guess fundamentally, I just- wanted to be something else. Other than what I was. I never wanted to be a king. Just a creator. That- that's the natural order, not monarchy. But once I built it, I had to get out somehow, so I left.

[Blaine is quiet for a moment, and then finally:]

I'm sorry if this is painful to talk about.

Thank you for explaining it to me.

29 [Video] | Forward dated to the 7th.

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