integrity: [Season Seven] (♆ Nothing but monsters.)
Crowley ([personal profile] integrity) wrote in [community profile] sirenspull2012-12-06 12:54 am

29 [Video] | Forward dated to the 7th.

[Crowley is alive.

This is a shocking fact, seeing as he fully expected to die. He even set up his so-called last will and testament, to set aside his funds and business transactions and all other sorts of things, in preparation for his death. However meaningless this universe is, Crowley is nothing but pragmatic. And as he sits in his chair, in his office, nothing seems out of the ordinary, save for a few things.

Once, he is holding a glass of liquor, which is hardly unusual. What is unusual is that his fingers grip it unusually tightly, almost as if he is convinced he is going to drop it. His eyes are lacking some of the spark that they usually hold, resigned and weary and ready to quit, though Crowley does not quit. He holds himself as someone who has lost a great deal but is far too stubborn to actually roll over and take it -- and as Crowley takes a sip of scotch, he clears his throat and speaks, his words slurring only slightly. He has great practice in speaking while intoxicated.]


I saw God yesterday, while I was stabbing my friend to death.

[Crowley considers that for a moment before he decides 'screw it' and finishes off his glass.]

I suppose I should get an attorney for that incriminating statement, but I'm having difficulty caring, as God is the one who put him out of his misery. The same one who allowed our world to dissolve into chaos and misery and let's not forget what He allowed His own poor stupid useless children to do to it, they killed one another because Daddy never hugged them. And you know what the best part was?

[Crowley huffs a soft laugh as he puts the glass back down. His fingers twitch to themselves and, perhaps in a delayed reaction, the demon swipes his hand across the table to let the glass hit the ground and shatter. It was only crystal. He can just buy another.]

He was right in front of our faces the entire time, God, the witless wonder that thought it would be funny to create an entire dimension dedicated to souls shredding each other for punishment and thought it would be hilarious to let Lucifer break out of his Cage and thought it would be hysterical for Castiel to --

[But Crowley stops himself, because that is getting into something of a deep and personal moment for him, and one can't have that. Instead, his tone lowers to something soft as he pushes himself up, hands keeping himself steady at his desk.]

If you want to speak with the useless twat, our Savior, His name is Chuck Shurley. Pray to Him if you want to know why Castiel lost his mind and the Leviathan ate your friends. I'm certain He has all the answers in the world for why they existed in the first place.

[And Crowley shuts off his feed by knocking his NV off of his desk.]
therightchoice: (the stars threw down their spears)

text;

[personal profile] therightchoice 2012-12-06 07:06 am (UTC)(link)
did you really create all the dinosaurs?

[ Look, a kid's gotta know. ]
Edited 2012-12-06 07:10 (UTC)
paterelohim: (= in the distance)

text/private;

[personal profile] paterelohim 2012-12-07 01:42 am (UTC)(link)
[Oh, Jesse. It's a miracle; this actually makes him smile.]

Most of them.
therightchoice: (so I smote him & his gore)

text/private;

[personal profile] therightchoice 2012-12-07 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
[ Any major life revealations involving Jesse's cosmic ancestry can wait for another day. ]

were they on noah's ark?
paterelohim: (= awkward speech giving)

text/private;

[personal profile] paterelohim 2012-12-07 03:53 am (UTC)(link)
No, they went extinct hundreds of millions of years before people were around.
therightchoice: (why should I care for men of Thames?)

text/private;

[personal profile] therightchoice 2012-12-07 04:00 am (UTC)(link)
that's not what my sunday school told me.

[ So Jesse guess his daydream of Jesus riding a Brontosaurus will never happen. ]
paterelohim: (= take a hike)

text/private;

[personal profile] paterelohim 2012-12-07 04:10 am (UTC)(link)
Your Sunday school was taught by liars. Sorry, man. A lot of the Bible is either wrong or really exaggerated. Like, a lot of old religions have stories about huge floods destroying everything. The one in Genesis only covered parts of Israel and Jordan.
therightchoice: (so I smote him & his gore)

text/private;

[personal profile] therightchoice 2012-12-07 04:46 am (UTC)(link)
[ Jesse feels a small pang of anger and annoyance - more lies, even from the church his parents made him go - but he soon thinks on something else. ]

is there anything in the bible that's real?
paterelohim: (= i have a 13-inch dick)

text/private;

[personal profile] paterelohim 2012-12-07 04:58 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, lots of stuff. Elisha really sent a bear to eat some kids who made fun of him. There were lots of wars and shit. There was really an exile to Babylon and really slaves in Egypt, and really incest. A lot of it. So much.

Oh, and Mary really did get in trouble for being pregnant when she was 14.


[chuck put down the bottle

put down the bottle chuck

chuck




c h u c k ]
therightchoice: (heard & saw such dreadful things)

Re: text/private;

[personal profile] therightchoice 2012-12-07 05:03 am (UTC)(link)
[ CHANGE THE TOPIC TO DINOSAURS, QUICK. ]

did you get her pregnant?

[ Jesse really shouldn't ask that but not everyone gets a chance to talk to God. ]
paterelohim: (Default)

Re: text/private;

[personal profile] paterelohim 2012-12-07 05:05 am (UTC)(link)
oh my god no

no

it was just a miracle, it kind of just happened. boom, you have a son of god in the oven.
therightchoice: (Father how can I love you?)

text/private;

[personal profile] therightchoice 2012-12-07 05:15 am (UTC)(link)
[ Jesse couldn't help but smile at the "oh my god no" text. It's just absurd.

He really couldn't pursue that line of questioning anymore because then it will be too awkward. ]

you should have let the dinosaurs live, then jesus would have rode on a brontosaurus or a triceratops than a donkey.
paterelohim: (= it's called multitasking)

text/private;

[personal profile] paterelohim 2012-12-07 05:49 am (UTC)(link)
the reptiles had to go if mammals were ever getting their day
therightchoice: (Till we have built Jerusalem)

text/private;

[personal profile] therightchoice 2012-12-07 05:35 pm (UTC)(link)
ok but what about the saber tooth tigers those are cool
paterelohim: (Default)

Re: text/private;

[personal profile] paterelohim 2012-12-10 03:42 am (UTC)(link)
they evolved into tigers and lions, what's wrong with that?