forty second dance | video; tiny bit forward dated to midmorning!

[motioned]

[The face on the screen, when first she appears, looks a bit somber.]

I guess the longer you live here, the longer you learn to expect the unexpected, huh? But even then, I didn't think - I mean, Halloween passed, so I thought maybe nothing awful would happen. I've lived here for two years and it still catches me off guard, things like that. I just hope it wasn't anyone with powers behind it. If it was, they should be ashamed of themselves. But that's not what I wanted to talk about, even though I'm really sorry to anyone who saw things that hurt them.

[But then her expression brightens considerably.]

I wanted to talk about, um, being here so long, but it's not as self centered as it sounds, I promise - I guess I just wanted to thank everyone. I think I might have said already, but it's been two years today, and even though the first few months I hated it and just wanted to go home, I think I wouldn't be the same person I am now if I hadn't come here. Not just a different person, but not as good of a person, either. I mean, I've learned so much, and so many people have helped me learn that stuff, both stuff about me and stuff about life, and I wouldn't trade that for the world. Maybe not for any world. I can't help but feel like this is my home. I've met so many people, so many amazing people, people I think of as family who I would never have even known about otherwise. And a lot of them aren't here anymore, some of the best people I've ever met, but I would much rather have known them and lost them than the alternative, you know?

[Her voice gets a bit thick, though it's not in the least unhappy, and she has to pause for a moment to recollect herself.]

So I guess, just - even though horrible things can happen here and things can get very bad, and everything seems dark, I just hope everyone here can find as much light in this island as I've been able to. But I know not everyone's as lucky as me, and I know there are people who have been through things I can't even imagine, so... I'm not the best with technology, but I guess since I'm saying this to everyone, you can all tell what my NV number is, so if everything gets to be too much - there's always someone you can talk to, even if I don't know you.

[Filtered to Fakir]
I need to talk to you.

[Filtered to Gilbert]
Are you busy?

Comments

[motioned]

Yes, I'm sure! And I know I can, that's why I'm - I mean, why I'm trying to - I know!

[rewritter]

Right. I just wanted to remind you of that.

Calm down, idiot.

[motioned]

I-I'm calm!

[Convincing...]

[rewritter]

You're not fooling anyone, you know.

[motioned]

I don't need to fool anybody if it's true!

[rewritter]

If it's true, you wouldn't be stammering like that.

[motioned]

I'm not stammering, I'm just - trying to tell you something!

[rewritter]

If you say so.

What is it?

1/3?

[motioned]

I do! I—

2/3

[motioned]

[And then she stops, nervous. She can feel her cheeks flushing already, she notes with a grimace; why had she thought this was good idea?

Because two years in this place had made her realize things she never would have known otherwise. Especially today, when she's thinking of all that time, it seems important. Today, she can't stop thinking of things that have made her happy here, things that have hurt her here, but maybe most importantly - the things she regrets. The way she hadn't told Jack thanks for always being there before the Core sent him back home. How she'd never said how much Maya meant to her. Waiting is always pointless in a place that could change your entire world in a matter of minutes, if not seconds.

And thinking of time - how many months had she waited for him? How many weeks had it taken her to know how to categorize the way he made her feel? How many days would she ache if she woke up tomorrow to find him gone again, without having a chance to explain this? How long has she been waiting to say these words to someone? Words that she could never say to Mytho, words that she might never be able to say to him if she stays a coward. If she doesn't hurry, if she ignores everything she's learned, everything that's telling her to seize the moment, each instinct that's overriding her fear, her anxiety, telling her to say—]

[motioned]

—I love you.

[rewritter]

[ ... he didn't hear that correctly. there was no chance he heard that correctly. ]

Wh... what?

[motioned]

[—and of course she goes completely red, now.]

I-I said I love you, you jerk!

[rewritter]

Wh-what are you talking about? There's no way that... you...

[ not as red as he is. this isn't some kind of joke, is it? ]

[motioned]

I'm trying to, trying to tell you something important, and you aren't listening!

[Avoiding eye contact (like a boss).]

[rewritter]

I am listening! I just...

[ Mytho. everything she'd done, everything he'd done was for Mytho. he couldn't blame her. everyone was in love with Mytho, he was just that kind of person. story-perfect.

and he'd chosen Rue. Ahiru was fine with it, and Fakir was fine with just being by her side. but she'd given up everything for Mytho, so why was she saying something like this now? ]

... I just don't understand.

[motioned]

[Still avoiding eye contact, she pauses, biting her lower lip for a moment.]

I know you don't, I just thought - that's why I should say something.

[The words come out slowly, anxiously.]

[rewritter]

[ that look didn't fit her. he reached forward, took her hands almost without realizing it. ]

... What about Mytho?

[motioned]

[That makes her look up and catch his gaze, finally; it's surprising enough that she makes eye contact once more, trying to see why he had taken hold.

The question, though... She can't deny it gives her pause. She also can't deny she still loves him - a part of her thinks she always will. Is it even possible to love two people at once? Maybe she's doing this wrong. But, she shakes her head, trying to decide how to answer.]

He isn't here. And even if he were here, he wouldn't be here, I mean, not for me. Not the way that you are. I don't know if that makes any sense, but...

[rewritter]

It's fine to be hurt that he loves someone else.

[ he wasn't hurt that she loved Mytho. but it was like a fact of life. hearing something like this was like hearing someone debunk the theory of gravity. ]

And I'd be here for you if you loved me or not.

[motioned]

I know it is, and I know you would be, but that doesn't change—

[Another pause, another breath, another glance to the side.]

The fact that I do. Love you, I mean, I do.

[rewritter]

[ he doesn't know what to say to that, but he knew what he'd always wanted to do since their pas de deux in the lake. and he still had her hands in his, and she was this close and she said she loved him, which was something he never thought he'd have a chance to say to her.

but he didn't say it, just leaned down to kiss her. like he'd always wanted to do. ]

[motioned]

[She doesn't really know what she expected him to say or do; if he had said he didn't feel the same way, she knows somewhere deep down that she would have moved on, just like she had with Mytho. She hadn't really thought of what would happen if he said he returned her feelings, and she hadn't even considered what was happening as a possibility.

There's a flood of surprise, her eyes opening wide, but it's followed by a wave of warmth as they slide shut. She moves her hands to his face as she kisses back, smiling despite how flushed she is, not saying a word to ruin this moment.]

[rewritter]

[ he'd been okay with being selfless and protecting Mytho for so long, he'd forgotten what it felt like to just be selfish and want something like this for himself. but he'd wanted this kiss for a long time, even if he tried not to admit it to himself.

after a moment, he finally pulled back, searching her face with an awed look, like he still had trouble believing that this was even real. ]

[motioned]

[She looks down, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear absentmindedly. There's no hiding how strong her blush is, but for once, it's almost as if she doesn't notice or care. The smile on her face is bright, spreading without hesitance or doubt; it feels as if her very soul is buoying. Lightly, sweetly, as she looks back at him:]

I really, really love you.

[And then suddenly she feels her eyes moistening, and she raises her hands from his to wipe the beginning of tears away.]