† THREE [voice] - backdated to about the 16th.

[upstairsbrain]

[ Well, he's taken some time to mull over what Magento told him about his time in the Port: the time he doesn't remember. And thinking it over, trying to reason it out, searching for a shred of memory to explain why he'd done it... nothing like that had worked. So, finally, the younger Winchester comes over the feed, his voice almost jerky, mechanical. To many, it may seem like he's just tired, but to those who know him well... ]

Sorry about being M.I.A. If anyone needs me, I'll be around. I'm taking a sort of--

[ He trails off, and then clears his throat. ]

... Anyway. I'll be back soon.

[Private to Dean Winchester:]
I'm not going to be at home for a few days. Don't tell Mom, alright? I don't want her to worry.

[Private to Castiel:]
Can we talk? In person?

Comments

voice; private;

[momchester]

So you made a post to the Network about it? Sam, what's going on?

[Mary doesn't believe him because- because she doesn't know how to read him. Before Sam was always going through something bad or lying to her, so she can't tell his lying voice from his regular voice, or tell when something is wrong. Something's always wrong.]

voice; private;

[upstairsbrain]

It's nothing. [ Oh, how far from the truth. He winces, and revises. ] I'll talk about it. I will, I just... not now. I need some time.

voice; private;

[momchester]

...Someone told you, didn't they.

Damn it. What did they say? Sam, don't disappear. Please.

[She curses again. Her brain is rapidly unraveling; she can feel her sanity going with it. She pops a Xanax, a sound now familiar to the family.]

voice; private;

[upstairsbrain]

I'm just going to talk to Cas. [ He's trustworthy, please don't worry. Don't be sad, or upset. ] I'll come home soon. Just-- don't think too much about it, okay? I-- I get it, if you're angry. I deserve it.

voice; private;

[momchester]

Sam, you can't do this. You can't disappear. Please. You did this last time. That psycho put me in the hospital and you weren't THERE.

[She's not really realizing how unfair this is, not at the moment. She will soon, but right now everything is rising in her mind like bile and she can't think straight. It's Sam, he's leaving again, vanishing, hiding behind those walls and it's taking her straight back to where she was months ago, but she's more broken this time.]

You always promise you'll be in touch, but you never are.

voice; private;

[upstairsbrain]

I'm so sorry. [ He is, he really is. It was bad enough with John, but he can't shoulder this, too, at the moment. ]

I promise. I'll come back.

[ And because he has to, because he can't take much more of this, he ends the call. For now. ]