004: [ video ]

[his_own_will]

[ he frowns into the camera ] This doesn't make any sense. Why would you want to let a fat man carrying a bag of toys into your house in the middle of the night after the sirens have gone off? Wouldn't that just ruin the darkness protection on your house?

Oh, and why do you call it Christmas? Can't it just be a winter festival?

[ because other then the creepy fat man in red and the constant badgering to spend his money, Christmas didn't really sound like a bad holiday. He liked gifts! He liked giving gifts. He just didn't see why this Christ fellow had be dragged into it as well. Honestly, it almost sounded like something straight out of a horror book, or will be by the time Oz is through dissecting it. ]

Comments

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[retraced]

[He cringes involuntarily.]

Huh?! Are you sure that would be a good idea?!

[He's tiny and fragile!]

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[his_own_will]

We'll put on training wheels.

[ a regular old tricycle ]

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Won't that offend him...?

[This is a really bad idea. Which means it's perfect.]

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[his_own_will]

Why? Aren't you supposed to use them if you've never been on a bike?

[ so perfect ]

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He's going to be an adult! Wouldn't it embarrass him to start learning something like that now?

[He's sensitive to that sort of thing!]

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[his_own_will]

[ Oz blinks and then he grins ]

Do you know how to ride a bike?

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[Brief...hesitation...]

Of course I do.

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[his_own_will]

Then you can show him how it's done!

[ and if Gil does it in private, no one need ever feel embarrassed, right?

Until Oz takes a video of it. ]

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[Wince!]

I wouldn't be the best teacher for something like that, though...!

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[his_own_will]

Eh. But you just said you knew how to ride...

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Knowing something and teaching something are two completely different skills!

[And he's no good at either of them.]

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[his_own_will]

Maybe I should get Break to do it then... [ that can't end in a disaster, nope. ]

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--He'd teach him incorrectly on purpose!

[That'll end in broken limbs and tears.]

Just pick something else for a gift!

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[his_own_will]

[ but... but...

Fine ] We should get him some proper underwear then. Everything he owns is extra frilly and itches. [ yes, yes this is a thing. ]

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[/chokes]

How do you know that?!

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[his_own_will]

I borrowed a pair a few months ago. [ when he was Alice ]

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[Gilbert has blocked that whole thing from his mind, okay. He can't handle thinking about it.]

But that's not really a proper gift either...and it's more insulting.

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[his_own_will]

But if it's more comfortable, he might thank us for it later on... [ stop shooting down all his ideas. He's running out of context! ]

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[That's...a good point.]

You don't think he'd be offended? Really?

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[his_own_will]

[ he's all smiles ]

We'll throw in a few hair ribbons just in case. I'm sure he'll love it!

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[Dot Dot Dot]

Fine. I'll get you some money so you can buy it for him.

[Just don't put his name on the gift too!]

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[his_own_will]

[ Put it on the gift. Right. He'll remember that. ]

Thanks, Gil! I'll make sure to get him something extra nice and soft!

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[retraced]

Don't put that much thought into it! It's someone else's underwear!

[Stay pure, Oz!]

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[his_own_will]

... But it's a gift. You're supposed to put thought into it.

[ he is! Just not so pure as Gil might think... ]

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[retraced]

Call it a gift all you want, it's still underwear...