[And she does, she cries as hard as she can for a stupidly long time, sobbing into Michael's shoulder about anything and everything that runs through her mind. It's a torrent of her innermost demons and deepest sorrows, the wounds that run deepest and will never heal.]
-I'll never see them again and he doesn't get it, he hates me for it he thinks I'm a bad mother and all I want is just- to just- to hold them again and tell them I love them and say goodbye just once. [She kind of loses it for a minute after that, and resolves into-] -I lost my family and I'm not even allowed to act like it. I can't hurt for them because I need to be a mom to these people and I don't know how. They're everything I always promised wouldn't. I. I died for that, and they still grew up broken, there's nothing I can do about it. And Sam-
-[She actually looks up at Michael for this one.]
He was the first person I saw here. I got rescued from the Darkness and then when I posted he was the first... person to answer me. [She wipes tears from her eyes, rather pointlessly as she's still crying.] He was so good and he took me out to breakfast and he was the first face I saw and then he told me and I was so proud of him for going to Stanford.
I- [Crying again.] I don't think I ever really knew him. He had that. Demon blood. Angel. Everything, I didn't know him, they all told me over and over that it wans't really him but Michael, I don't have anything else. [Desperately] He's the only Sam I know. And he's gone. I'll never see him again.
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-I'll never see them again and he doesn't get it, he hates me for it he thinks I'm a bad mother and all I want is just- to just- to hold them again and tell them I love them and say goodbye just once. [She kind of loses it for a minute after that, and resolves into-] -I lost my family and I'm not even allowed to act like it. I can't hurt for them because I need to be a mom to these people and I don't know how. They're everything I always promised wouldn't. I. I died for that, and they still grew up broken, there's nothing I can do about it. And Sam-
-[She actually looks up at Michael for this one.]
He was the first person I saw here. I got rescued from the Darkness and then when I posted he was the first... person to answer me. [She wipes tears from her eyes, rather pointlessly as she's still crying.] He was so good and he took me out to breakfast and he was the first face I saw and then he told me and I was so proud of him for going to Stanford.
I- [Crying again.] I don't think I ever really knew him. He had that. Demon blood. Angel. Everything, I didn't know him, they all told me over and over that it wans't really him but Michael, I don't have anything else. [Desperately] He's the only Sam I know. And he's gone. I'll never see him again.