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sirenspull2012-06-25 03:07 am
thepull_mods) wrote in sirenspull2012-06-25 03:07 am
Entry tags:
news feed; Monday, June 25th 2012
Monday, June 25th 2012
Weather A mix of sun and cloud. Slight chance of showers. Risk of an afternoon thundershower.. High 22°C and a low of 15°C (72deg;F/59°F)
Current Moon Phase: Waxing Crescent
Morning sirens go off at 5:13am, and evening sirens are at 9:17pm.
News & Advertisements
- SERO issued an immediate product recall on its commercially successful RoboMow Lawn Care System, an automated multifunction landscaping tool that just seems to be coming back with too many reports of freak accidents with a defective body-heat detecting shut-off sensor system, and bugs in the programming which trim unspecified topiary bushes into the shape of genitalia.
"Please. Please, enough with the weed-whackers and bush-trimming jokes" begged a department representative over the phone this morning, when questioned about the faulty product line. SERO’s robotics engineering division has sold the product patent to their affiliate company, Violet Systems, which promises less funny business in software development.
- HELP WANTED: Spirit-Sensitive Individuals for Spirit Elimination
To all psychics, spirit mediums, spiritually-sensitive individuals, etc: Your discreet help is requested for a most urgent matter involving the lost souls of the dead. I need a spiritual incidence cleared away from my property. You will be paid handsomely for your services, so long as all spirits, ghosts, demons, or any other sort of supernatural entities are banished permanently. $1000 per person as a flat rate, more if you provide evidence of further ghosts eliminated. Your confidence in this matter is most appreciated. Please contact Susan for details.
- FOR SALE: Dulcinea's Spell Dispeller, while supplies last! Love potion backfired? Endless supply of beer or money flooding your home uncontrollably? Accidentally turned your daughter into gold, or your mother into a bear? Don't let bad sorcery ruin your life, Try Dulcinea's Spell Dispeller!!! Buy now and you'll get your second bottle free in our LIMITED TIME PROMO OFFER.
Mention today's ad for a free sample of Dulcinea's Delicious Aura Cleaner potion!!! You may meet your soulmate tomorrow, make sure your aura is looking its best!!
- AUTO AUCTION: 1975 VW 1303 Superbeetle, refurbished Salmon Pink body in good condition, 45,000 miles and runs like a charm! Custom zebra-upholstered ejector seats, sunroof & fully loaded stereo sound system. Lot #13 @ Keelsons Auctionhouse, Noon today.
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[ News Notification Thread]
Weather A mix of sun and cloud. Slight chance of showers. Risk of an afternoon thundershower.. High 22°C and a low of 15°C (72deg;F/59°F)
Current Moon Phase: Waxing Crescent
Morning sirens go off at 5:13am, and evening sirens are at 9:17pm.
News & Advertisements
- SERO issued an immediate product recall on its commercially successful RoboMow Lawn Care System, an automated multifunction landscaping tool that just seems to be coming back with too many reports of freak accidents with a defective body-heat detecting shut-off sensor system, and bugs in the programming which trim unspecified topiary bushes into the shape of genitalia.
"Please. Please, enough with the weed-whackers and bush-trimming jokes" begged a department representative over the phone this morning, when questioned about the faulty product line. SERO’s robotics engineering division has sold the product patent to their affiliate company, Violet Systems, which promises less funny business in software development.
- HELP WANTED: Spirit-Sensitive Individuals for Spirit Elimination
To all psychics, spirit mediums, spiritually-sensitive individuals, etc: Your discreet help is requested for a most urgent matter involving the lost souls of the dead. I need a spiritual incidence cleared away from my property. You will be paid handsomely for your services, so long as all spirits, ghosts, demons, or any other sort of supernatural entities are banished permanently. $1000 per person as a flat rate, more if you provide evidence of further ghosts eliminated. Your confidence in this matter is most appreciated. Please contact Susan for details.
- FOR SALE: Dulcinea's Spell Dispeller, while supplies last! Love potion backfired? Endless supply of beer or money flooding your home uncontrollably? Accidentally turned your daughter into gold, or your mother into a bear? Don't let bad sorcery ruin your life, Try Dulcinea's Spell Dispeller!!! Buy now and you'll get your second bottle free in our LIMITED TIME PROMO OFFER.
Mention today's ad for a free sample of Dulcinea's Delicious Aura Cleaner potion!!! You may meet your soulmate tomorrow, make sure your aura is looking its best!!
- AUTO AUCTION: 1975 VW 1303 Superbeetle, refurbished Salmon Pink body in good condition, 45,000 miles and runs like a charm! Custom zebra-upholstered ejector seats, sunroof & fully loaded stereo sound system. Lot #13 @ Keelsons Auctionhouse, Noon today.
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[ News Notification Thread]
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