004 || video

[slipperysoul]

[ Angel’s lingering by the angled late-day sunlight coming in through a dusty window of an abandoned warehouse when he turns on his NV, looking about as calm as can be for what he’s about to say. ]

Should have apologized weeks ago for what I did. Nobody should have been killed, I never wanted that to happen. Not here.

But how do you forgive part of who you are when you’re already condemned to hell. Absolution isn’t something i’m looking for anymore when there’s already nothing I can to do to stop the inevitable.

Saving the world doesn’t do anything when you’ve spent a few hundred years doing much worse. [ a beat, while he glances out towards the fading light. ] So what else is there?

Comments

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[slipperysoul]

You're welcome.

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[faking]

[Pause - conflict - he opens his mouth.]

Are you scared? Of hell?

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[slipperysoul]

[ He only hesitates for a second, trying to decide if he actually has to think that one over. ]

No. Lot more scared of other things.

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[faking]

I think that's smart. Especially if hell is inevitable... It's a waste to be scared of something you know for sure will happen. It's what you have to wonder about that's scary. That's true, right, isn't it? Like, what if my goals collapse? What if the person I love dies before I do? How am I going to eat tomorrow? Those sound a lot scarier than brimstone.

[This is all said very matter-of-factly, in a tone soft-edged and more like evening than how daylight-bright he'd previously spoken. But then he puddles into something more emotional: ]

I guess it's more frightening when you think about other people, though. Hell is all well and good if I have to go, but there are people who - if they were condemned or forsaken by God or whatever - I think for me, that would be worse than going myself.

[He stops talking, and then, solemnly, he puts his fingers to his mouth.]

I'm saying a lot. I couldn't help it.

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[slipperysoul]

[ Angel just listens, somewhere between concerned and understanding and confused because he's not entirely sure where all this is coming from. And he really doesn't know why he's getting all of it.

Not that he minds, of course. Which he'll say in.. one second.]

I don't mind. There's a few people i'd take the place of if they were destined to go to hell. Not sure it counts since i'm already on my way, but it's not anywhere they need to end up.

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[faking]

I think it counts. A lot of people say they'd do all sorts of things - take a lover's place in Hell, or walk a thousand miles on foot to find that lover, or whatever bullshit they think is romantic. [That's hypocritical; he thinks they're romantic, too. But: ] They can say it all they want, but I don't think humans can really be like that. Or at least, they have to learn how. You though - you would - wouldn't you? You'd do those things for the person you love? [He sounds hopeful.]

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[slipperysoul]

[ Kid, where are you getting this all from. He wants to give you a hug or a pat on the head or something. ] I would. I've already taken my place in a hell dimension once, i'd do it a thousand times over for the people I love.

Otherwise nothing I did would matter.

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[faking]

[Big stories come from little people, sometimes. And talking like this, he acts like he has a soul to bargain, but it's already been sold.]

I'm glad you understand. Lots of people don't.

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[slipperysoul]

[ Angel knows this, mature words can come from any source, no matter what age. It's just surprising after not having talked to someone so... small as of recent. ]

I think lots of people can't understand.